Today, I took my kid to a pig farm near Mexico City, I think I let him get a little too close to the animals, FML

But more seriously, leave a comment if you think the whole Swine Flu is total BS to keep once again the world in fear and have them worry about stuff that doesn’t really matter.

Just check the price of oil today (dropping), and the prices of small pharmaceutical companies on the stock market (some doubling today)

World Domination BS… don’t fall for it.

Who benefits from Swine Flu

• The US tourism industry by keeping millions of dollars from going to mexico. Just one airplane going to Cancun from say Florida, will take about 300 passengers. In average each passenger will spend at least about $1,000. That’s $300k a pop. I’d imagine there’s at least 10 flights a day going to Cancun from several destinations in the US. That’s $3MM that stay in the US or go somewhere else. Now multiply this by the number of touristic destinations in Mexico plus flights that come from other countries. Their economy must be bleeding tens of millions a day because of this.
• Companies that use pork derived products, now they can get pork for a lot cheaper. Think McDonalds, Wendy’s, Burguer King, Super market chains. Buy low, sell high
• 3M has had to step up their mask production to keep up with the demand coming from CVS, Walgreens, Rite Aid, etc.
• Pharmaceutical companies related to vaccine R&D

In the meantime, I see nothing but a pattern of destructive media against mexico, first it was the Drug lord wars, then Swine Flu, and more recently an Earth Quake (I totally believe the US must have weapons to produce earthquakes, it’s the perfect attack, you can blame it on mother nature)

                          

Having all this money, there’s an ingenious evil marketing strategy you can implement that will make you look good, get your free press and it’s only going to cost about $150,000, which is the equivalent of let’s say 3.6 hours worth of your revenue, so think about it, in 3 and half hours from now you should have the budget for it.

If you have made up your mind 3.6 hours after reading this, here is what you need to do:

1) Start modifying the logo of your company on every holiday or special occasion.
2) Create and promote a competition in all schools across the country for kids to redesign an “out of the box” version of your logo, and offer $50,000 in prizes.

Open the competition to all U.S. residents between the ages of 5 and 18 who attend elementary and secondary schools (i.e. grades K-12) in the U.S. The National Winner will win a $15,000 college scholarship to be used at the school of their choice, a trip to your main Office, a laptop computer, and a t-shirt printed with their doodle. Also award the winner’s school a $25,000 technology grant towards the establishment/improvement of a computer lab. (This is where you’ll spend roughly $50k)

The Prizes will go as follow:

What your company gets in exchange:
Free Press on all major media outlets TWICE, once when the competition is announced and once when the winner is announced. You know that if you wanted to get that amount of attention it would cost you millions of dollars in advertising. Nothing beats free press baby!

Best of all, you will inspire millions of kids ages 5 to 18 to admire your company and your brand, you will imprint your logo in their brains permanently, they will redraw it over and over while thinking how to make your company better. They will even write essays about you.

All the kids get to think they’ll make the best logo and win the first prize (poor bastards). This is the best time to create an image of trust in their minds when they think of your brand. In the future it will be hard for them to pick any other competing company over yours. In the end they will also be more than willing to work for you once they’re old enough.

And remember… Don’t Look Evil!

                          

002. Start using IRC.

003. Group and birth a site.

004. Experiment with research chemicals.

005. Design a three-step program.

006. Take a powerful stance for something positive and essential.

007. Regulate nothing.

008. Say that you have to move in two weeks, but stay for seven months. Come back a year later and do it all over again.

009. ROTFLOL.

010. Relax, you’re already halfway there.

011. Just kidding.

012. Don’t think outside the box.
Build a box.

013. Support support.

014. Organize and go to parties and fairs.

015. Start 30–40 blogs about the same things.

016. Drain the private sector of coders, graphic artists and literati.

017. Create a prize that is awarded.

018. Express yourself often in the media, vaguely.

019. Spread all rumors.

020. Seek out and try carding, and travel by expensive trains. Don’t order sushi.

021. Start a radio station.

022. Everything you use, you can copy and give an arbitrary name, whether it’s a news portal, search engine or public service.

023. Buy a bus.

024. Install a MegaHAL.

025. Make sure that you are really good friends with people who can use Photoshop, HTML, databases, and the like.

026. Read a shitload of philosophy.

027. Give yourself cult status, and act accordingly.

028. Never aim.

029. Pick on everyone.

030. Invent or misuse Kopimi.

031. Do things together as a composition, not as a collective.

032. Make your advertising confusingly similar to that of established ventures.

033. Always act with intent.

034. Assert, in any context, that the establishment is lagging.

035. When criticized, blame others and refer to the cluster formation’s non-linear time-creating swarm hierarchy.

036. Send everything to all media, regardless of niche.

037. Start an anonymous confession venture.

038. Make babies and blog their upbringing.

039. Be sure to closely study and keep abreast with substances.

040. Participate in lively Internet discussions that don’t interest you.

041. Start at least three to four IRC channels about every project.

042. Fight and make up often.

043. Share files with anyone who wants them.

044. Deal often with humor sites.

045. Hang out with the Left, the Right, and the Libertarians.

046. See “23” in everything.

047. Flirt with money.

048. Be AFK very little.

049. Threaten large American culture corporations.

050. Broadcast radio from Skäggetorp.

051. Make a “100 list” for successful projects.

052. Be unsure what the list should be named.

053. Take upon yourself a lot of projects.

054. Make sure to be connected to technical, aesthetical, and philosophical people of world class competence.

055. Sleep over at each others houses regularly.

056. Publish a book about Kopimi.

057. At a trial, deny everything.

058. Cultivate unfounded myths and react to them.

059. Hack sites, e-mail accounts, and more.

060. Continuously mock and ridicule all aspects of copyright.

061. Create an Internet site where people can buy and sell votes in democratic elections.

062. Claim to be true, fair and satisfied.

063. Collect money for fraux’s trip to Iceland.

064. Confidently claim that all disconnected computers are broken.

065. Do NOT go to Kurdistan.

066. Make sure to thoroughly establish the claim that all hardware is overpriced.

067. Affirm all words and signs.

068. Mindfuck each other to appropriate extent.

069. Take care of small animals.

070. Create and spiritualize the concept of “Snel hest.”

071. Start and own a think-tank.

072. Deny magnetism.

073. Start a business school. Drop out.

074. Write press releases often.

075. Use IRC while in your underwear, and eat pizza.

076. Juggle with other people’s balls.

077. Ensure that there is no conclusive evidence of Ikko giving monki advertising money by means of volada’s helicopter.

078. Cause inflation and a global financial crisis.

079. Express yourself vaguely if anyone asks you, “How much is a bandwidth?”

080. Use “dynamic” to mean “completely out of control”.

081. Never mention Hotmail, MSN, or Windows.

082. Have all project meetings on IRC.

083. Claim to receive around 1256 e-mails a day.

084. Force a prosecutor to draw up several thousand pages of drivel.

085. Above all abstract everything.

086. Have a liberal vision of hell.

087. Consider yourself overly qualified for top positions in American film and music industries.

088. Create the world’s largest file-sharing service in a twinkling.

089. Attract international attention by accident.

090. Control the portal and opinion makers in all mediums.

091. Standardize and explain your way of doing things at all levels.

092. Have 3576 anonymous confessions on your hard drive. Including the authors’ IP addresses and personal information.

093. Preserve the Internet.

094. Mention the Internet as a source in serious discussions.

095. Rarely mention reasons for your IT elitism.

096. Dismiss expressions like “from farm to table” as superstition.

097. Follow the yellow fellow.

098. Skip the last points of your 100 point list.

099. Establish social services as a parody of antisocial services.

100. Start from scratch.

100. Be careful of burning kittens.

100. Write a book, but start with the back cover.

100. Use parables in abundance, preferably about “butter” and “snow”.

100. Stop using IRL. Use AFK instead.

100. Cultivate contacts within the powers of state intelligence services.

100. Always define “flat organization” arbitrarily, subjectively, and without common sense.

100. Upload.

100. Take over #g-d.

100. PROFIT.

                          

Me and my family saw this (and laughed hard as I took out the camera without hesitation) on our way into the first G car on Court Sq. (headed towards Greenpoint of course) First thing that came to my mind. “This is so NewYorkShitty.com material”

If you find the image funny, wait until you read the post by Miss Heather, which made this very “Dear Reader” have a real LOL.

Please Digg Up Miss Heather’s Post

About NewYorkShitty.com
Taken from it’s About Page:

As you can probably deduce from the title of this blog, I live in Green Brownpoint, Brooklyn. During my one block trek to the Franklin Corner Store one April day (in 2006) to get a sandwich, I was astonished at the sheer quantity of dog shit I encountered.

Green Street is not the easiest sidewalk to negotiate: the sidewalks are uneven and pock-marked with holes. Dodging piles of dog shit every five feet does not make this task any easier, much less when carrying delicious Cuban sandwiches. It was during this adventure through Poopland that I had the following epiphany:

1. This is ridiculous.

2. I wonder if the people who see fit to use my block as a pissoir would like it if I took a shit in the middle of their living room? Probably not.

3. This is like walking through a fucking mine field, so maybe…

4. if Queen Noor (and Lady Diana before her) can lobby against the use of land mines, perhaps I can raise awareness about the plague of unattended dog shit in my neighborhood. Call me the Dog Shit Queen of Greenpoint New York Shitty. I’ve been called worse.

                          

This is one of the oldest self made t-shirts. I was constantly pissed at the amount of spam email I was receiving, and I thought some of the subjects were really eye catching for t-shirts.

For a few months I thought maybe I could make money on the creativity of spammers by mocking them with t-shirts, called, SpamTShirts, but nobody caught on my joke, and I desisted from the business idea.

If you can appreciate it, the icon/logo of the website is a Trash can, honoring junk mail.

I believe I made this t-shirt at cafepress.com

See the Previous T-Shirt
See the Next T-Shirt

                          

Best damn funny/controversial show I’ve seen. Seinfeld on steroids for what’s left of the decade.

From wikipedia:

The series deals with a variety of controversial topics, including abortion, gun control, physical disabilities, racism, sexism, religion, the Israeli/Palestinian situation, terrorism, transsexuality, slavery, incest, sexual harassment in education, the homeless, statutory rape, drug addiction, pedophilia, nuclear proliferation in North Korea, child abuse, mental illness, gay rights, bulimia, prostitution, nazism, necrophilia and cannibalism.

Stream provided by Hulu.

                          

This Verizon FIOS commercial always cracks me up.

In regards to FIOS I wonder how much money they’ve wasted advertising it, it’s been over the commercials are in the air but the service is hardly available anywhere. It’s either that or the fact their website sucks and you always end up forced to make a phone call, and that’s when they loose me, I just want to order the whole thing online, why wait 30mins until somebody picks up.

It’s hard to run a big company I guess, too many people that don’t give a damn about your business always end up making it bad.

                          

And here’s the video the boys made

                          

User luisdrk from Caracas,Venezuela has posted this picture on flickr. Pretty cool stuff. it’s actually a parody of this picture by Jesus Molina.

It’s really funny because we had our inspiration from a similar source, we looked for the words “frost wire” in flickr, and we saw frozen barbed wires, this is the one that caught our eye and then we talked to a great graphic designer who did the logo for us.

Reply with your creations on this post’s comments section.

                          

“Fuck it I’ll fund that!”
Hilarious.

                          

Give it a try at MyBloop.com

                          

Then I had a conversation with my wife, asking her if she was pregnant, for like 5 minutes I didn’t believe her, then it was all good, but it left me wondering things about how ready I’d be for a baby.

Today, Amazon.com writes:

Greetings from Amazon.com.

We’re contacting you about the e-mail message we mistakenly sent to
you indicating that an item was purchased from your baby registry;
this message was sent to you in error. We intended to send you an
e-mail regarding your Amazon Wedding Registry, but the text of the
message was incorrect. Please watch for a message regarding your
Amazon Wedding Registry in the next day or two.

We apologize for any confusion this may have caused. We are looking
into this matter and we are taking steps to prevent this from
happening again.

We value your business and look forward to seeing you again soon at
Amazon.com.

Sincerely,

Customer Service Department
Amazon.com

http://www.amazon.com

Please note: this e-mail was sent from a notification-only address
that cannot accept incoming e-mail. Please do not reply to this
message.

Funny how a reliable service can make a stupid mistake that even though it was just an email, is so meaningful, and in whatever the case, it could cause either surprise or a big dissapointment.

We even wondered if it was because we’ve been married for almost a year, that amazon was getting into pregnancy prediction spamming algorithms.

Good thing we’re not trying with doctors and stuff to have a baby, I guess it would’ve been a lot worse.

                          

This is probably my favorite part of the movie, check this out

                          

Teaser for Doug Benson’s super anticipated documentary Super High Me, a documentary where he smokes pot for 30 days and then doesn’t for 30 days.

                          

Excelente pregunta de parte de la reportera.

                          

Created by my good friend Alex Martinez

                          

Espero que sepas que es un Death Note.

                          

Con la melodia de “Y Viva Espana”, demasiado comico.

                          

Ø 40-ish..............................49.
Ø Adventurous......................Slept with everyone.
Ø Athletic............................No breasts.
Ø Average looking.................Moooo.
Ø Beautiful..........................Pathological liar.
Ø Emotionally Secure..............On medication.
Ø Feminist...........................Fat.
Ø Free Spirit.............................Junkie.
Ø Friendship first...................Former Slut.
Ø New-Age.................Body hair in the wrong places.
Ø Old-fashioned....................No B.J.'s
Ø Open-minded.....................Desperate.
Ø Outgoing......................Loud and embarrassing.
Ø Professional............. ..........Bitch.
Ø Voluptuous.......................Very fat.
Ø Large frame.......................Hugely fat.
Ø Wants soul mate.................Stalker.

                          

Mas fotos de Brooklyn y Manhattan tomadas ayer aqui.

                          

A mi me dio mucha risa la fabrica de emoticones :), vamos a ver si logran pillarlo.

                          

“Not that there’s anything wrong with that”

                          

New York State Driver License!

I can rent a car!!!!! Yay!!!

BTW, I’m pissed that I got my upgrade in New Jersey instantly, then I go to NY to switch it, and it took them 2 weeks to send me the license. BULLCRAP!

                          

My initial proposal would be to tax per every pound extra, per month, there should be standards defined based on your age and size.

Say something like one dolar per extra pound a month would do the trick. Millions of dollars could be used towards Health care and to those that declare themselves as hopelessly fat (which is bullcrap cause I saw that show called The Biggest Looser, and big whales ended up skinny with a lot of hard work) could get liposuctions and treatment from all that money.

What do you say? How do we propose the Fat Tax? $1 per extra pound a month!

Ha, I was doing a little research and it seems I’m not so crazy:

Should we tax the fatties?

Forbes Magazine – The Fat Tax: A Controversial Tool in War Against Obesit

WHO Wants a Fat Tax?

Fat Tax on Wikipedia

It seems there would be other benefits like better distribution of food, imagine all the food that could be used for the hungry.

So I think I’m not so crazy then.

                          

Dale click a “Read rest of this entry” para ver el trailer.

                          

Here’s my score, what’s yours?

                          

The first one is a 50 sec short (in spanish) where I start what I called “Winter Education”, it’s very funny if you’ve never lived a winter before and you’ve never seen a stone bounce off of a frozen pond.

The second one was more of “Winter Education” this time mucking myself and teaching where not to go to skate, and where to go to skate during the winter in NYC, then I added the beginning of a music video where I’m the star, but I never finished editing it so you’ll see a black screen towards the end, while hearing some music.

And these are the trailer and a movie my girlfriend produced last year, I play as an extra, I appear playing a doctor on the phone in one of the scenes.

                          

I can spend hours If I propose browsing all kinds of funny and weird videos.

Here’s a sample of them.

Mario Unleashed – Some sort of high school presentation where they use a marimba and drums to play Super Mario Bros songs.

The Baby’s Fart (Very Very funny)

The Matrix Farts (or the Fartrix maybe)

A Girl flirts with the camera showing her thong and her bra (nice)

Some Ronaldihho and Maradonna Videos